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Review of “Bama Profiles in Courage: Laykin”: (Capers) Barr flexes through an emotional range that most writers would never dare attempt … Humor and Bama sorrow are fused together like twined tree trunks that keep each other standing…..It’s part satire, part character study, with a wry lens on fame, fandom, and the modern South. Well done, Capers, well done.”– Ian Allen, The Times Literary Supplement.

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All SEC Teams by the Cat’s Meow

Randy Sanders revenge? 1st Team Offense QB Andre Woodson, Kentucky RB Darren McFadden, Arkansas RB Felix Jones, Arkansas WR Marcus Monk, Arkansas WR Keenan Burton, Kentucky WR Earl Bennett, Vanderbilt TE Jacon Tamme, Kentucky C Jonathan Luigs, Arkansas OG Herman Johnson, LSU OG Will Arnold, LSU OT Andre Smith, Alabama OT Michael Oher, Mississippi K…

Capers Barr
2–3 minutes

Randy Sanders revenge?

1st Team Offense
QB Andre Woodson, Kentucky
RB Darren McFadden, Arkansas
RB Felix Jones, Arkansas
WR Marcus Monk, Arkansas
WR Keenan Burton, Kentucky
WR Earl Bennett, Vanderbilt
TE Jacon Tamme, Kentucky
C Jonathan Luigs, Arkansas
OG Herman Johnson, LSU
OG Will Arnold, LSU
OT Andre Smith, Alabama
OT Michael Oher, Mississippi
K Brandon Coutu, Georgia
KR Felix Jones, Arkansas

1st Team Defense
DL Quentin Groves, Auburn
DL Tyson Jackson, LSU
DL Glenn Dorsey, LSU
DL Derrick Harvey, Florida
LB Ali Highsmith, LSU
LB Jasper Brinkley, South Carolina
LB Jonathan Goff, Vanderbilt
CB Paul Oliver, Georgia
CB Simeon Castille, Alabama
S Derek Pegues, Mississippi State
S Jonathan Hefney, Tennessee
P Britton Colquitt, Tennessee
PR Rafael Little, Kentucky

2nd Team Offense
QB Erik Ainge, Tennessee
RB LaMarcus Coker, Tennessee
RB BenJarvus Green-Ellis, Mississippi
WR Percy Harvin, Florida
WR D.J. Hall, Alabama
WR Early Doucet, LSU
TE Chris Brown, Tennessee
C Antoine Caldwell, Alabama
OG Jim Tartt, Florida
OG John Jerry, Mississippi
OT Ciron Black, LSU
OT Chris Williams, Vanderbilt
K Ryan Succop, South Carolina
KR Tristan Davis, Auburn

2nd Team Defense
DL Titus Brown, Mississippi State
DL Myron Pryor, Kentucky
DL Theor Horrocks, Vanderbilt
DL Antwain Robinson, Arkansas
LB Wesley Woodyard, Kentucky
LB Jerod Mayo, Tennessee
LB Darry Beckwith, LSU
CB Chevis Jackson, LSU
CB Jonathan Zenon, LSU
S Reshard Langford, Vanderbilt
S Tony Joiner, Florida
P Ryan Succop, South Carolina
PR Mikey Henderson, Georgia

3rd Team Offense
QB Tim Tebow, Florida
RB Keiland Williams, LSU
RB Kregg Lumpkin, Georgia
WR Andre Caldwell, Florida
WR Tony Burks, Mississippi State
WR Kenny McKinley, South Carolina
TE Cornelius Ingram, Florida
C Drew Miller, Florida
OG BJ Stabler, Alabama
OG Robert Felton, Arkansas
OT King Dunlap, Auburn
OT Phil Trautwein, Florida
K Joshua Shene, Mississippi
KR Keenan Burton, Kentucky

3rd Team Defense
DL Curtis Gatewood, Vanderbilt
DL Jeff Owens, Georgia
DL JT Mapu, Tennessee
DL Wallace Gilberry, Alabama
LB Luke Sanders, LSU
LB Weston Dacus, Arkansas
LB Prince Hall, Alabama
CB Matterral Richardson, Arkansas
CB Jonathan Wilhite, Auburn
S Craig Steltz, LSU
S Kelin Johnson, Georgia
P Tim Masthay, Kentucky
PR Derek Pegues, Mississippi State

4th Team Offense
QB Matthew Stafford, Georgia
RB Ben Tate. Auburn
RB Rafael Little, Kentucky
WR Mohammad Massaquoi, Georgia
WR Dicky Lyons Jr, Kentucky
WR Sean Bailey, Georgia
TE Andy Boyd, South Carolina
C Josh McNeil, Tennessee
OG Christian Johnson, Kentucky
OG Justin Britt, Alabama
OT Eric Young, Tennessee
OT Jamon Meredith, South Carolina
K Lones Seiber, Kentucky
KR Marshay Green, Mississippi

4th Team Defense
DL Eric Norwood, South Carolina
DL Marcus Harrison, Arkansas
DL Sen’Derrick Marks, Auburn
DL Xavier Mitchell, Tennessee
LB Brandon Miller, Georgia
LB Freddie Fairchild, Arkansas
LB Casper Brinkley, South Carolina
CB Bryan Evans, Georgia
CB Trevard Lilley, Kentucky
S Marcus McClinton, Kentucky
S Aairon Savage, Auburn
P PJ Fitzgerald, Alabama
PR Jonathan Hefney, Tennessee

5 responses to “All SEC Teams by the Cat’s Meow”

  1. Pug Avatar
    Pug

    What exactly is Sen’Derrick short (or long) for? If it’s Senator Derrick, he should just use that handle.

  2. Ed Orgeron's Nipple Ring Avatar
    Ed Orgeron’s Nipple Ring

    Go Ole Miss!!

  3. Cutcliffe Avatar
    Cutcliffe

    Does Steele think Fulmer pissed in his Cheerios?

  4. jonkoncak Avatar
    jonkoncak

    For the love of God. Is there any reason to have a “3rd Team” in any category, much less an All-SEC team? I hope this is a joke, but it could just be a reflection of the society we live in that gives feel good awards to kids that suck at whatever they do. Sure little Johnny went 4 for 4 again in T-ball and drove in the game winning run, but little Billy got his first hit of the season, off of the tee, so he get’s the game ball. Damn, the 90’s raised pattycake, don’t-put-the-suckey-kid-in-rightfield-let-everybody-hit generation, also known as generation ‘E’ is starting to vote.

    I do like that Andre Woodson is the 1st team quarterback. All the homers are too busy debating Ainge, Stafford, Tebow, Mitchell, Wilson, Cox, or Mitchell to take notice of how good Woodson is. His skills may not translate to the pro game, but don’t be suprised if Woodson finishes the season as the league’s best QB. 1st teamer cornerback Paul Oliver is not eligible and will be entering the NFL supplemental draft.

    Is it just me, or is Phil Steele an excellent porn name?

  5. Bob "Blumpkin" Tebow Avatar
    Bob “Blumpkin” Tebow

    I am sure he has a pornstache too

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