Review of “Bama Profiles in Courage: Laykin”: (Capers) Barr flexes through an emotional range that most writers would never dare attempt … Humor and Bama sorrow are fused together like twined tree trunks that keep each other standing…..It’s part satire, part character study, with a wry lens on fame, fandom, and the modern South. Well done, Capers, well done.”– Ian Allen, The Times Literary Supplement.

Next up on our Athlon preview [Athlon] are the Cal Bears. Everyone that is anyone knows that the Pac 10 uses faster stop watches than the SEC. Look at this guy. He is a Tennessee fan. He has a Pac 10 Stop watch [Here is a real Cal Preview].

PAC 10 Stopwatch

(Goodness, a 3.9 forty, You can’t cover that!!!)

(Double click the picture to enlarge)

There are some “Tennessee” fans who like to feed the Vol Internet Jock Sniffers and Sniffer-Sniffers shit on how fast and dominating Cal is and the sniffers just eat it up. Here are some snippets of one fan at work: “every Cal WR runs a sub 4.3 40” and “do not argue with me piss-ants, I know more about football than any other human being on earth because I was in the Texas Relays 50 years ago”. What is pathetic is that the Sniffers are so ingratiatingly masochistic in absorbing his condescending insults of the Vols.

Before last year’s Cal Game, they were a wealth of information about the big scary Bears. Even after the public humiliation of Cal in Knoxville, “Tennessee” fans were militantly vocal of the “aberration” of Cal being thumped so soundly. Even to this day they will argue that Tennessee should have lost that game.

Athlon says: If the Heisman Trophy were to go to the player with the ability to change the complexion of a game on one play better than anyone else in America, DeSean Jackson would be front and center at this year’s ceremony, and probably would have been last year. Jackson has been Cal’s leading receiver in both of his first two seasons, averaging 17.1 yards on 97 catches with 16 touchdowns. He also ran back four punts for touchdowns last year, giving him five for his career, and was the recipient of the Randy Moss Award as the top return man in the nation. He takes just about one out of every five punts he touches the distance.

We say: Who can forget how DeSean changed the complexion of Army All star Game with this hot dog Reggie Bush tumble-fumble play? Let’s face it, as we are continuously bombarded on the Tennessee message boards whether it be Rivals or Scout, Tennessee or any other team doesn’t have a chance against the ass blistering speed of Cal or the Tedford Curse.

[THERE’S A CURSE on Jeff Tedford prodigies. Akili Smith, Joey Harrington, David Carr. Yes, Trent Dilfer got a ring, but that was based more on Baltimore’s historic defense. And Kyle Boller isn’t lighting the world on fire.]

The Golden Bears are champing at the bit to get at Tennessee after the Vols shot them down in last year’s opener in Knoxville. The Cal-Tennessee game opens the 2007 campaign for both teams in Berkeley on Sept. 1. Coach Jeff Tedford’s club also gets Oregon State and USC at Memorial Stadium but travels to UCLA in October. The Big Game this year is at Stanford.

We believe Tennessee wins at Cal, but only after adjusting to the quiet finesse of a PAC 10 Stadium filled with nerds, at least our (UT) nerds kiss women and are not afraid to pray in public!

6 responses to “Every Rose has it’s Thorn, Cal’s Speed is Un-Godly”

  1. Taco Bell Soft Tacos Avatar
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    Hopefully that hot pole vaulter will be in attendance at that game. I would rather watch her than Cal’s 3.2 40 WRs.

  2. […] Every Rose has it’s Thorn, Cal’s Speed is Un-Godly Next up on our Athlon preview [Athlon] are the Cal Bears. Everyone that is anyone knows that the Pac 10 uses faster […] […]

  3. Your nerds pray in public??? HA finally this nerd will be able to dish out a over the head, ass ripping, atomic wedgie come september. YESSSS!!!

  4. Congratulation man..you r now in the top posts of wordpress…

    Canvas of life – The lives of real people around

  5. Cal is like diarrhea; fast, but smelly and doesn’t have solid depth.

  6. Cal is like diarrhea; explosive, fun to watch, and just might burn you

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