The REDACTED message board didn’t get a vote in Tennessee’s quarterback decision, which seems unfair considering it spent the off-season studying blurry practice clips, parsing adjectives, and consulting anonymous sources.

Then the coaches decided.

A dangerous precedent.

Pong423 announced:

“This was over after the spring.”

Well, shit.

Would’ve been useful before the board spent four months questioning George MacIntyre’s ability to operate household appliances.

UpperDeckOracle agreed:

“This seemed inevitable.”

Inevitable.

The sun would rise.

Water would remain wet.

Faizon Brandon would start at Tennessee.

Apparently, the entire offseason was just something to do between lunch and blood-pressure medication.

Then Volstradamus declared:

“It was never a competition.”

Josh Heupel apparently staged four months of practices to spare George’s feelings while Volstradamus monitored events from behind the wheel of his wife’s Subaru.

Then Erik Ainge decided to complicate the narrative.

The former Tennessee quarterback posted:

“George played his butt off in camp. Made it a legit battle. Stay dialed in. Never know when your number gets called.”

Two good quarterbacks.

A legitimate competition.

Respect for the guy who didn’t win.

Naturally, this triggered immediate E-violence.

SourceMaterialVol addressed a poster who had spent weeks insisting the competition was already over:

“You remember when you said the competition was over before fall camp? And remember when you claimed you heard it from some really important, high-up people?”

He was just getting warmed up.

“Erik Ainge was my source telling me it was absolutely a legit competition, and I owned your bish azz. Sit down, child.”

Nothing says mature quarterback analysis like citing a former SEC quarterback while typing bish azz.

Another poster responded:

“You’re the one acting like a spoiled BRAT. Chill!!!”

Three exclamation points.

The universal sign that everybody involved is chilling.

Then MaryvilleReb34 entered the exchange:

“Idk if Ainge’s wiener can get any deeper in your mouth.”

And there it was.

A former Tennessee quarterback offered a thoughtful assessment of two young players.

Within minutes, the fan base was arguing about the depth of his penis in another man’s mouth.

Somebody else suggested Ainge should reach out to George about losing a quarterback battle and bouncing back.

A sensible thought.

It had no chance.

By then, half the board was celebrating Faizon, the other half was revising its predictions, and two grown men were conducting a public custody dispute over Erik Ainge’s genitalia.

Meanwhile, G-Mac became:

“A good backup. Gotta be ready!”

That’s your girlfriend saying she hopes you can remain friends while her new boyfriend waits in the driveway.

Then OrangeRevisionist cleaned up the historical record:

“We had posters who HOPED G-Mac would win the job.”

Hoped.

Nobody predicted it.

Nobody argued experience would matter.

Nobody insisted Heupel wouldn’t trust a true freshman.

They merely hoped.

The G-Macolytes weren’t wrong.

They were dreamers.

Please respect their privacy during this difficult time.

Had MacIntyre been named the starter, these same people would be explaining why that had been obvious since spring.

Experience mattered.

System knowledge mattered.

Faizon wasn’t ready.

Everybody knew.

They always know.

Especially five minutes after everybody else finds out.

Josh Heupel named a starting quarterback.

REDACTED scheduled an oral examination.