By 4:03 Monday afternoon, The Power T had seen enough.
“Texas -3.5 and we’ve got people on here acting like we have no chance”
His point was simple. If Texas were as much better than Tennessee as the board had decided, the line would not be sitting around one score. Tennessee could lose. Tennessee could also win. Some of these predictions, he said, were just fricking ridiculous.
Then he added the sentence that changed the entire thread:
“Maybe it’s ok if Tennessee isn’t good enough”
rkc1234 immediately identified one of the defendants.
“@AlmightyOtto says Texas will
Blow the Vols out”
Then Hard Data arrived to dispute something else entirely.
“-3.5?
Last time I looked it was -6.5.”
That is how Texas week began: Tennessee fans arguing over whether Tennessee fans had already surrendered, followed immediately by an argument over the exact size of the surrender.
The predictions were not difficult to find.
AlmightyOtto: Texas 41, Tennessee 14.
Karl82: Texas 31, Tennessee 6.
Will Vol: Texas 35, Tennessee 13.
cneagle: Texas 34, Tennessee 20.
District Vol: Texas 30, Tennessee 13.
007Vol: Texas 31, Tennessee 17.
SPiffVol: Texas 27, Tennessee 14.
Karl had Tennessee scoring six.
SIX.
Two field goals? A touchdown with the extra point blocked out of respect for Texas?
We are preserving 31–6 for the historical record.
BrakeJobVol, a service adviser from Cleveland who has not enjoyed Tennessee football since the Clinton administration: Texas 38, Tennessee 10. “Our tackles will get exposed by the second drive. By halftime Heupel abandons the run. Seen this movie.”
RockyHillAdjuster, an insurance claims adjuster from Knoxville who treats optimism as potential fraud: Texas 45, Tennessee 17. “People are going to be shocked how far apart these programs really are. This could get embarrassing early.”
Excellent. We now have two men voluntarily reporting to work on Tuesday morning after spending Monday night forecasting the collapse of the football program they supposedly enjoy.
There Is Another Possibility
Or maybe we’re witnessing something considerably more sophisticated: high-level message-board espionage, ingenious guile and a calculated effort to make sure the right people leave with exactly the wrong idea. The stakes could hardly be higher.
Texas fans are reading Tennessee boards. Somebody in Austin is reading Tennessee boards. Somewhere a graduate assistant making $28,000 a year has probably been told to find out what these people know.
If so, the board is doing magnificent work.
The board is littered with threads like Tennessee can’t block. The freshman quarterback is in trouble. The running backs are hurt. Will Muschamp is coming. Texas may win by four touchdowns. Nothing to see here. Please forward directly to Sark.
Karl82’s 31–6 whipping may not be pessimism. Karl may be serving his the Big Orange Nation.
The Power T, unfortunately, nearly compromised the operation by reminding everybody that Texas was only favored by a few points.
Hard Data immediately repaired the breach.
“Last time I looked it was -6.5.”
Operational security restored.
Then SulliVol Brought Numbers
SulliVol, an assistant plant safety manager from Columbia, arrived with statistics and suggested everybody “pump the brakes.”
Nobody did.
Big Orange Bo pointed out that Tennessee has been held under 20 points at home only twice under Josh Heupel.
Both times against Georgia.
Then somebody asked the question nobody in this particular thread needed asked:
Who was Georgia’s defensive coordinator?
Will Muschamp.
The board had just located a fresh basement beneath the basement.
There were Tennessee picks. Bear_Vol had Tennessee 27–23. UTChuck54 went 45–31. JudgeVolLC had Tennessee 28–27.
So the board had not completely abandoned the football team.
Then came the part worth recording.
VolNavyMan thought everybody was being too negative.
“I am a bit shocked by the % of posters who thinks we’re gonna get smoked. I will be shocked if that happens.”
VolNavyMan. The straight man to every joke.
Of all people.
When VolNavyMan is walking through a Tennessee prediction thread trying to restore emotional balance, LWS has an obligation to document the moment.
Maybe the board really believes Tennessee is about to get run out of Neyland.
Or maybe 31–6 is our generation’s Operation Mincemeat.
Either way, Texas has been warned about absolutely nothing useful.
We are, after all, historians.
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